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March 20, 2014

"Give Rinintha the right shoes and she... will thank you a lot."

No shoe fits my feet perfectly. My feet are size 37 in the width but 35 in the length. I've got 7 pairs of shoes and they hurt my feet, all of them. Socks don't help much.

It's sad, you know. It's like being punished for somebody else's mistake. Being hurt, rejected, for being who you are.

February 14, 2014

Frank & Frank

Meet my favourite Franks!


The man who introduced Sinatra to me was the man who introduced Chelsea as well.

He loved to hum Sinatra's songs. He always loved to hum, anyway, especially in the shower. When his cassettes aged and no longer sounded the way it should, my mother decided to buy him CDs and I lent him my CD player. Mama bought him Sinatra's My Way album and Matt Monroe's Born Free greatest hits. He loved them, of course. So did I.

When we watched football matches, he wasn't the one who yelled keep the blue flag flying high. He was the rival instead. The red one. Strangely, though I adored him beyond everything, I wasn't affected to be in love with his favourite team. I found the blue one was more attractive. Especially their co-captain.

Frank & Frank are legends. So are you, Eyang.

February 7, 2014

Note to Self?

Here, here, I give you the largest image so you can see how your face would look like if you kept those ugly thoughts inside.

"You can have a wonky nose and a crooked mouth and a double chin and stick-out teeth, but if you have good thoughts ... you will always look lovely."

Mr. Roald Dahl, everyone.

January 31, 2014

HELLOOO!

HELLO HOW ARE YOU? FINE? GOOD! YES I'M INTENTIONALLY SCREAMING IN YOUR HEAD.

God it feels sooo good to be back. The exhausting December has gone, iya gue juga kecewa kenapa momen-momen menyedihkan itu harus membombardir gue di bulan Desember, and even though I still felt the gloom till early January, I can say now that I have recovered. Tapi ya, gitu, now that I finally get the peace of mind, my physical health starts to tumble down. My voice leaves me somewhere.

So how's your holiday?
Liburan gue ya, gitu, jagain Raka. It's a pleasure, actually, but I do miss my solitude. Coba bayangin, dia bangun jam 8 pagi dan terus berkeliaran di sekeliling gue "gaaarrrrhh garrrhh!" sampai jam 10 malam.
Lalu bikin kue, lalu tenggelam dalam kata-katanya Murakami dan Richard Wright, lalu mainan cat poster dan play-doh, lalu gue mulai kehilangan konsistensi penggunaan bahasa dalam menulis postingan ini. Ah, ya sudah lah, ya.

Terus apa lagi? Oh, I had a "debate" with my mother. It was sad. I was sad. Gue nggak pernah bermaksud untuk membantah, but, hey there, I had something to say too. Bukan pembenaran, it was just something in my mind that I wanted you to hear. If it's wrong, you can say it later on my face, "You're terribly wrong, moron." but please hear me first.

Anyway, ini beberapa "cita-cita" gue yang harus tertjapai sebelum akhirnya kembali ke Nangor:
1. Get my first teeny tiny wage.
2. Spend my first teeny tiny wage.
3. Write 2 articles for the blog.
4. Melahap karyanya Roland Barthes.
5. Have a fully-attended and warm mini reunion.
6. Finish the scrapbook.
7. Tambah tinggi.

This month I've read probably four books and one of them is The Giving Tree by Shel Silverstein. Iya itu buku anak-anak, tapi gue suka.. dan kesel. Coba deh, baca, you can find the pdf somewhere. The tree is a female, dan dia jadi bodoh saat jatuh cinta. Oh.. Well.

Remember the beautiful Holly Golightly? Mr. Capote, the character creator, put these words in his book, "Anyone who ever gave you confidence, you owe them a lot." 

ENJOY YOUR HOLIDAY! FREE HUGS FOR EVERYONE! *hugs*

January 17, 2014

Grumble.. Grumble..

Lately, doing human activities (atau apalah namanya) becomes a hard thing to do for me. I don't eat normally. I reject invitations in order not to meet more people. I think the urge of communications first before make one. I tell lies. If you ever ask me something, anything, in this holiday, the chance of me telling you the truth is only 65% if you ask about personal life and 89% if you ask about academic one.

My parents have come to realize that their daughter is totally useless, you know, you can hear it in the way they're talking to me. How come a daughter, a twenty something woman, sleep or play video game way too much in a day and being careless to her 84-year-old grandpa and her ill mother?
I spend my time with Raka, though, I don't think he's human enough.

Speaking of my mother, she, as an optimist, believes that everything happens for a reason. I, as a person who can't understand the way she sees life, totally disagree with that. If everything does happen for a reason, thus somebody owes me a brief explanation about how those evils get huge rewards for things they effortlessly did.

Jim Rohn's words keep echoing in my head. You're not a tree. If you're not happy where you are, move. If you don't like how things are, change something. Err. Easy, isn't it?

Ah, how I love those words: things they effortlessly did. Don't they seem to ring any bell?

January 3, 2014

13

Malam pertama gue di 2014 diawali dengan mimpi tentang zombie. Lagi. Katanya kan, kita nggak bisa mimpiin orang yang belum pernah kita lihat, ya? Lucu juga, berarti mereka yang jadi zombie di mimpi gue sebenarnya orang-orang yang pernah gue lihat di jalan. Atau bintang iklan sabun cuci di TV. Atau suster di rumah sakit yang bilang turut berduka cita sambil menepuk bahu gue.

So, how was your 2013?
Mine was started with KKN. Everything was okay actually, bahkan gue akhirnya pergi mancing untuk pertama kali setelah mengidam-idamkannya selama belasan tahun, tapi sayangnya pacarku kesetanan disana, jadi aku dimarahi terus selama satu bulan.

Months later, July 25 to be precise, tiket VVIP untuk nonton Chelsea jatoh dari langit. You've got no idea how incredible it was when the light of the stadium blinded my eyes as I stepped in. The chants, the color of blue, bahkan bapak-bapak di belakang gue yang neriakin Roy Suryo untuk main, had completely made my palms sweat. And then there he was.. the man I've been in love with for the whole 7 years, sat on the bench.

Iyaaa, segitu doang keliatannya. Dekil pula kayak abang-abang teh botol. Tapi aku tetap cinta.

He saw me. From now on I can appear on his dreams. Jadi zombie juga nggak papa.

Beberapa bulan kemudian Alek dikasih ke temennya Aya. Terus gue nggak inget apa-apa lagi selain December 6-7.

To be honest, the last month was a tough one. Harusnya gue bisa menikmati film natal sambil ditemani rintik-rintik hujan, ini boro-boro. Kalo nggak nangis, marah. Mungkin menopos sudah mau tiba.

Anyway, ini beberapa hal terfavorit sepanjang 2013.
Games: Far Cry 3 (not sure whether played it in 2012 or 2013), FIFA 14.
iOS Game: Granny Smith.
Book: To Kill a Mockingbird (Harper Lee).
Movies: Gravity, Monsters University.
Songs: Saving All My Love for You (Whitney Houston), Summer Wind (Frank Sinatra).
Something I baked: Brownie.
Moments: When somebody quoted my writings or simply said that he/she loved them; December 6.

Resolution? 1366x768.